I thought I’d preface this rather dreary Day In The Life post with a cheery photo of me in my messy new bedroom from Saturday (see earlier post – this was clearly before I realised it was about vampires).
Today, I have been trying to get my shit together and failing miserably. I slept in, with the company of Max, as I’m on a late shift at work. The first day is always the worst. When I got out of bed, I felt decidedly dodgy and that’s lasted all day – a bit like I have a hangover without having had any of the accompanying fun.
I had a shower – which has been rather a disappointing experience in our new house. The shower looks good, a big old Victorian rainshower head, but you can either have a warm shower with all the pressure of a kitten licking you, or a burning hot shower with the pressure of a thousand spears. Bah.
Once I got out the shower, I realised that someone was in the garden cutting the grass. Hopefully, they didn’t see me in the shower through the blind-less window… I got dressed, had some breakfast (strawberries) and then drove Max and I down to the park for a walk around the reservoir. We saw one other dog and a lot of crows.
When we got back, I had some lunch (a lamb sandwich, left over from dinner yesterday) and a drink and Max and I listened to the radio for a bit. Then I spent about 3 hours trying to lock the bloody door – the locks are very stiff – and then went off to work.
I’ve been in rather a bogged down fug for a while but the past week has been hard. I can’t put my finger on what it is, but I’m struggling to adjust to our new surroundings and I’m having quite a crisis of confidence with The Bellwether. I feel like I’ve been droning on about this for a long time, but last week, someone highlighted to me that an Etsy shop is selling two of my designs as if they’re their own and I haven’t been able to shake it off. Usually, I sigh, get angry for 10 minutes and then shake it off, but I think starting from the standpoint of not knowing what I am doing anymore has made it all the harder to get over (I’ve contacted them, they’ve ignored me and the things are still for sale). If I was to give up every time I found someone ripping me off, I’d never get out of bed, but this week, I really just feel like I’ve had enough.
Having closed the shop whilst we moved house, I didn’t miss it. I wasn’t itching to get back to it. And I’m now thinking, maybe I should just give it up now. Maybe with business being in the doldrums and me feeling so miserable about it, maybe that’s the natural time to call it a day? But then what if I change my mind and the damage is done? Really, I need to make a decision and implement it.
Well, I suppose that’s what happens with Day In The Life – sometimes you get fun days (like Kim‘s – she got a new puppy!) and sometimes you get pissers like mine. Meh.
4 thoughts on “My Today”
Hey Claire, I just wanted to stop by and give you a big internety hug. I felt kind of like you needed it. I really enjoy your blogs so I am sad to see you so down.
I really hope you find the right decision for you.
Big hugs, Jen x
Chin up, chuck. Hope you find a decision that is right for you, but I agree you should make one. My vote goes for shutting up shop – life would be so much more fun and so much less stressful, I think, and you could focus your attentions on your new house etc. so you’d still be very much occupied and I’m sure you’d find plenty of new projects to give you a sense of achievement/fulfillment, like what you are going to do with all those rooms…? But I guess that is easy for me to say, as someone who could pester you for items in real life if I missed your shop too much 🙂
I think you write really well and I wonder if you could write advising others on small business? You are one of a very few who tells the truth about the craft world: your post about rubbish craft fairs was spot on, and I think people would really enjoy your take on the world of small indie businesses. Hope that wee ramble is of some help!