Day In The Life 12th July 2011

Here’s my very long, in all sense of the word, Day In The Life.

03.50 Wake up, confused. I can hear geese. This has happened every night about this time for the past week or so. Maybe they’re not geese, but whatever birds they are, it sounds like they’re having a coffee morning directly over our house.

04.45 Having drifted back off to sleep to dream of telling Katy about finally having “a proper conversation with Wayne Rooney” (?!), I wake up to my alarm going off.

04.50 The only time anyone should be up at this hour is if they are going on an exotic holiday.

Have shower, too late, I realise I have run out of conditioner. I went swimming for the first time in ages last night and my coloured hair is subsequently like straw.

05.23 Drying, straightening hair in the living room. Have skooshed in some Aussie leave-in conditioner in hopes my hair will less resemble a haystack. Have extreme indigestion and headache the size of China. My eyes, as they say, are like dug’s baws – I can’t face make-up, the world will have to contend with my face au naturale today.

05.37 Leave flat, trying to be quiet so as not to wake up Lee/the neighbours. Go out and sit on the steps to wait for my taxi. I quite like this bit as it’s quiet and the weather is nice and it’s about the only peace I’ll get all day.

05.43 Taxi arrives. As per usual, they’ve sent a 7-seater minibus for solely me. Driver asks me which route to take which is one of my particular bugbears about taxi travel – you’re the expert, pal. As I’m not paying, I couldn’t give a rat’s ass which route you take, as long as you get me there for 05.50. I work in Cessnock, and we drive through downtown Govan to get there, which is, at this and most other times of the day, like being in a zombie movie. It’s surprising how many junkies there are out wandering the streets at this time, mostly with dubious dogs.

05.50 After a detour up a wrong street (clearly Glasgow taxi drivers don’t need The Knowledge), arrive at work. Unlock the office and fire up computer. I’m Duty Editor today, which is a bit nerve-racking, as it’s only my second day doing it. Fire up all 6 of my TVs, except my split-screen one, which is meant to show 4 channels simultaneously is somehow showing 16, all blue screens. This is the umpteenth way in which I have broken this since last week.

06.33 The first half hour passes in a blur as apart from breaking the telly, the next thing I do is knock off the diversion of the phone from the London office to here. I scramble about trying to relay instructions on how to fix it to London colleagues, only to later realise that by simply logging in as my late-shift colleague, I can get it back. Slightly red of face, I email everyone in the organisation to inform them normal service is resumed (only about 8 million people).

06.55 Notice subtitling gaffe on telly – not sure what it was meant to be, but they were talking about TV property shows – “You could host a show called Going For Bras…”. Pretty sure that’s not what it was meant to be.

07.30 Breakfast. Belvita biscuits have revolutionalised my life.

07.33 “An imprint of an owl on heroin doe…” Yeah – that should be window. How is this top news today with everything else that’s been going on?!

08.49 The morning has not been going all that well. I’ve managed to break several things and have spent a lot of time working out how best to word that in my event log.

09.27 Have been dealing with more technical problems. My standard tech support response of “switch it off and switch it back on again” not cutting it for national TV.

09.43 Watching Heir Hunters, in a professional capacity. Joke with colleague that everyone secretly watches this to check they’re not missing out on a small fortune. We’re both probably a bit not joking.

10.05 Eavesdrop on manager colleague explaining how to subtitle Rastamouse to a trainee. It’s a crash course in patois for all concerned.

10.59 After breaking and fixing several more things, hear news that colleague’s baby has been born. Ah, that’s nice. Also get an email that gives me cause to feel slightly murderous towards my ex-boss-now-peer.

11.20 For the second day in a row, I have no-one to cover my break. Letting the phone ring out is not an option. Mildly cheesed. But mostly very hungry.

12.34 Someone finally agrees to cover me, so lunching. I have a quick jaunt to the sandwich shop for sustenance. I should be having something healthier than chicken mayo but that’s the only thing I like from there. No time or energy to forage further afield. I take it back to work and eat it in the kitchen, where a steady stream of colleagues come in and ask me questions about
work. Give up and go back to desk. Purchase some emergency drawstring bags, email Marceline about new website and cute iphone cases and Aleks about photos for the new website. Arrange to meet her tomorrow to collect my stuff she’s been photographing. Arrange for DHL to redeliver a parcel on Thursday (no idea what it is). Read a zillion emails which have arrived in my half-hour absence. Write a reminder on my hand to record Night Watch which is on TV tonight (I’ll be in bed when it’s on, at 9pm). Give up and return to desk, whereupon all hell breaks loose.

15.39 Draw breath for the first time in about 3 hours. This job is crazy mental sometimes. It is essentially professional worrying for 10 hours a day.

I kind of lose track of time but when I do finally leave work (late of course) I only get as far as top of stairs before I realise I forgot to email someone. It can’t wait til tomorrow. Back into office, fire up computer, send email. To the subway!

I was supposed to be meeting my friends the McChesneys but due to work, end up late and head for home via supermarket. I remember to buy conditioner. And dinner. At the check out, my phone rings. It’s Lee, stuck at Harthill services in his broken down van.

When I get home, I open the post and eat an ice lolly. In with post is a card from my cousin Anne in Cincinnati. She is really very thoughtful and has sent me a card thanking me for the birthday gifts I sent. She also says she’ll call me soon to discuss my mum’s surprise 60th birthday gathering in York next month – I can talk about this here as my mother is a techno-dullard who wouldn’t know a blog if it poked her in the eye and called her Bambi.

So, whilst I wait for Lee to be brought home by the AA again, I parcel up orders, reply to emails, check my new website photos again (they’re awesome). I also eat some pizza and receive a message from the sewing machine man that Jeff is fixed – hurrah!

19.30 Lee called to say he’s on his way home – being towed by the AA to the local garage. Jo texts me to say she’ll pick up my sacks of parcels to save me taking them to post office myself. Jo is my best friend and her husband took over a post office last year – result! It has really improved my life 1000-fold to have them take all my heavy stuff for me. I love them dearly. She texts again to ask if I have a cream handbag she can borrow (I don’t) and if I want anything from the supermarket (I don’t).

19.37 I am sewing a Make Tea Not War whilst I wait for people to arrive. Jo texts me and asks if she can borrow an iron. I have three so this is no problem (one for clothes, two for craft). Lee finally arrives home from the wilds of the M8 hard shoulder about 8ish.

20.15 Jo arrives to collect the mail. We have a mini-catch up by the roadside, I give her instructions on what goes first, second, recorded. Arrange to meet up soon to discuss, among other things, her mum’s wedding next year. Jo is always either going to a wedding, planning a wedding or having her own wedding (in March just past). She is the queen of lists, another thing we have in common – born organisers!

21.00 Checking the new photos against my revised product list. Answering emails from customers. Decide, on advice from Marceline, to upload photos to website now, which I have pencilled in for Thursday at some point. Text Jo as realise I forgot to give her instructions on the giant box of stuff for Red Door Gallery. Lee regales me with rubbish jokes whilst he eats his late dinner.

21.28 A bit of emailing with Marceline about another project we’re cooking up between us. Some boffin, from Glasgow Uni I think it was, called us serial entrepreneurs at a business event once. He may have a point. The hazards of being up at sparrow’s fart is that one must go to bed very early. Must go to bed.

22.09 finally in bed, having done a bit more admin, checked more photos and collected up a few stray things still to be photographed. Gather clothes for morning and put them in living room so as not to disturb Lee in morning. Will read a chapter of this book if it kills me – I want to finish and send it to Gemma soon, we have a period drama novel swap system going.

2311 Zzzzzzz.

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