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I would like to kill everyone. Except you. Obviously.

There comes a time when I can take no more and Tuesday evening was that time.

On Tuesday, Jo and I went swimming at North Woodside pool. It’s a small pool, but kind of Victorian-y inside with it’s high ceiling, balcony round the pool with changing rooms upstairs and pillars. Picturesque one might even say. But it’s also very crowded on a hot day during the school holidays. For this, we really should have been more prepared and headed to Scotstoun, where the pool is of Olympic proportions and therefore has lanes set aside for plodders, mid-range and speed swimmers.

Not so Woodside – this pool is so small it can only afford to lane off one small sliver of water for the people who are there to swim and not just fanny about with foam floats or chat with their friends in the shallow end. Unforunately, most people were there to swim. This meant about 15 people trying to plough up and down a stretch of water roughly the same width as your average bath. This also lead to severe lane rage from me and probably many others present.
Firstly, there was the woman with the dreadlocks who swam up and down the middle of the lane without looking where she was going, banging into all and sundry, clearly in another zone where qualifying for the Commonwealth games is her immediate goal.

Then there was her counterpart who swam up and down in the opposite direction from her splashing as hard as he possibly could and generally veering into everyone else’s paths. On top of this, there were the 2 Italians, one of whom had clearly burnt himself in the Scottish sunshine by the looks of his decidly raw nipples. They were clearly having their own personal Flipper in distress splashing contest.

Is it too much to ask for people to just swim? In a courteous fashion? Normally, I’d just say something to these morons, but there is something about being wet and half naked in public that restricts me from having it out with these people.

Anyway, that aside, we had an impromptu barbecue last nite at home. Lee had this marvellous idea as it was so damned hot yesterday that we should get some people round for a small soiree, and that is exactly what we did!
Photos are here.

Everyone had a great time I think – Aleks is truly the queen of the barbecue. We had time to squeeze in a quick round of Guitar Hero and also all us DS geeks managed to visit each others’ Animal Crossing towns and exchange fruit (I have apple and coconut trees now!) before midnight struck and we all turned into pumpkins … or went home, at least.

They have finally started knocking down the remaining houses at the back of our house, so hopefully the fire-raising neds will rack off now. Ryan told me that the fire brigade are actually patrolling the neighbourhood now, such is the frequency of fires in our area, but I did not believe him until mar-c confirmed this last nite on her way home. It really is ridiculous that they have boarded up these houses and left them for months, especially in such a deprived area as Maryhill, where the kids have nothing else to do but get hideously drunk and break things.



I’m Claire and I live near Glasgow, in Scotland. I have strong family ties to Cincinnati, too and regard it as my second home. If I had to describe myself in five words, it would be thus: Does. Not. Suffer. Fools. Gladly. I’ve been cross stitching pretty much all my life, but professionally since 2005, first as Miso Funky, then as The Bellwether and now under my own name. I'm known for my witty, sarcastic and occasionally profane typographic designs. My work has been featured in The Sunday Times, The Guardian, Channel 4 and on BBC television as well as numerous media outlets across the globe. At one point, I was kind of a big deal but I mostly just dabble in it these days when I have time. My website is a repositry of cross stitch charts, travel and food blogging and you'll find it at I also love to travel and eat, ideally travelling somewhere great to eat something brilliant. I'm fascinated by social history, particularly the Victorians and will absolutely beat you hands down in a quiz about the Tudors. Dogs are LIFE. I like being in water and have lots of ideas that will never see the light of day but would definitely be a winner on Dragon’s Den/Shark Tank. I love to give people gifts. I! also! overuse! exclamation! marks! sorry!

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